In more than thirty years of
work in the field of Information Technology, twenty of which in continuous
contact with customers, I learnt the importance of communicating and, above
all, of listening.
Over time and in different
roles, I found myself many times trying to sell an idea, a product, a project,
and all the times was a game of two, where the proponent and the recipient were
led by different objectives and the challenge was to reach the agreement that
would allow the deal to be closed positively.
Communicate and listen,
therefore, as an act aimed at
achieving the mutual empathy, that I think is the fulcrum on which to build
every relationship, being that with partner, friends or with businesses.
Over time, however, I
discovered how voice and hearing were not enough, because much of communication
- the most important part, by the way - is not explicitly communicated, but
must be derived from what we do as we speak and listen.
To speak with the body and to
listen with the eyes, we could therefore say, and this is the reason why, over
the years, I become passionate about non-verbal communication. Initially with
curiosity, but then with the awareness of its importance in any kind of
relationships, and this is why I decided to deal with it systematically,
alternating between study and practice, thanks to the work I have done for
years.
This harmonious - holistic
approach, I would dare to say - made of practice and study, has led me, among
other things, to get certification on the techniques and methodologies developed
by Paul Ekman for emotions recognition (Micro
Expressions, Subtle Expressions,
and Facial Actions Coding System).
Moreover, since I believe that
curiosity should never have ended, I have partially extended the study to
disciplines that we could define adjacent to non-verbal communication, such as
Neuro Linguistic Programming, which combines language, neurological processes
and behavioral patterns, and the Techniques of Persuasion, exploring how body
language plays a very important role in the psychology of acquiescence.
After all, I think I have
followed two parallel paths, which over time have positively contaminated each
other, where what I did in practice by virtue of my work in the field of sales,
benefited more and more from what I studied and observed in my interlocutors,
allowing me to better understand what they communicated, beyond the words they
used to do it.
Two parallel paths, run for
about ten years, that I have now decided to share with those who need it and to
do it in the same way I did it, showing how non-verbal communication is a very
powerful tool to improve what we do in everyday life: relate with others to
achieve our goals and their goals, remembering that success is always a
two-handed game, based on agreement rather than conflict.
A sharing, therefore, that I
decided to do from the point of view of those that really worked on the field,
from the point of view of those who led many communication battles with a plethora of interlocutors always different,
in character, role, personality and attitude; a diversity that every time
forced me to develop the right strategy and choose the most suitable weapons,
but always having in mind the final peace and not the enduring war.
If you were then interested in
how to expand your listening and comprehension skills in those real situations
that you face every day in your business, be it for example a negotiation with
a client or the presentation of your idea, then contact me and we will
understand together how I can help you.
If you were not
interested, however, I thank you anyway to have read up to here and I greet you
reminding you that "if words
communicate information, non-verbal language communicates emotions and
feelings".
Andrea Zinno - andrea.zinno@decorporisvoce.com
